Monday, 15 October 2012

Where is the Bathroom?

Monday evening, 15th October.  Tension is rising because the surveyor is due tomorrow to make his pronouncement on whether the bathroom is in fact a bathroom and whether that means that we are now eligible for a mortgage. 

I took no photographs of progress today as we seem to have stepped back in time to last Monday when the room was covered in rubble.  Perhaps my expectations have been raised too high as progress has been so rapid.  In reality, there has been progress today as the second doorway into what was the single cubicle loo has been blocked in and the room is being prepared for plastering. 

But with the floor covered in rubble and apparent rack and ruin everywhere, things felt a bit flat.  The plasterer has been muttering darkly about the fact that the plastering should have been done first.  I've tried to explain the urgent requirement to have a working bathroom before tomorrow and hence the rather back-to-front (not the term he used...) approach.

The surveyor's definition of a bathroom is, apparently, a room with a sink, loo and a bath or a shower.  Well, we're nearly there.  We have a sink and a loo. 

Onde é a casa-de-banho?

 We have a bath. 

где туалет?

And we have the pipes for a shower. 

Ble mae`r ty bach?

And, since today, we have both hot and cold running water for the sink, the bath and the showerpipes. 

Despite our promises to each other that this was going to be an enjoyable project, it hasn't been so far.  The issues over the mortgage, trying to sell, then rent the other two houses and then trying to get a bathroom in situ in little over a week have all been pretty stressful.  Kevin McCloud cautions that you need a full time project manager and he is right. 

As soon as we knew that we were going to exchange on Friday 5th October, we ordered the bathroom.  As mentioned previously, we'd decided to simply replicate our current bathroom so off we went to the BC Sanitan website, where the relevant items (or sanitary ware, to use the technical term) were selected and then ordered via a local supplier. 

On Wednesday 3rd, I rang to see how the order was going.  Everything but the shower doors had arrived and it was all taking up too much space in the showroom so could they deliver?  But was there anyone to help me as the bath was very heavy?  But it's only fibreglass, I thought.  A horrible feeling of doubt began to grow.  I went back to the BC Sanitan website.  It was cast iron. 

Πού είναι η τουαλέτα?

A long chat with one of the salesman followed.  He gave me a quick physics lesson and reassured me that it would be fine.  The floors could take it.  The bath arrived on Thursday.  Luckily, there was a driver and a helper.  The three of us managed to get it into the hallway.  Just.  But how on earth would the builders get it up the stairs and how could the floor possibly be strong enough to take the weight?  Would someone end up in the pantry, sitting in the bath?

Tuvalet nerede?

And it was battleship grey...

Bathroom kidhar hay?
The builders, as builders do, reassured me that it would be no problem.  And then the painter came...

Gdje je kupaonica?

Hvor er badeværelset/toilettet?  (The feet for the bath, in case you're wondering...?)

Kur ir tualete?

So now it's my favourite Laura Ashley Creamware (or, at least, a metallic version made to match) and the feet are matt, not shiny (they'd just been painted in the photo) black. 

Well, so far so good, the bath is in situ and can take the weight of S and the plumber.  For long enough for them to have their photograph taken anyway.

Dov'è il bagno?

There's more to blog about the bathroom.  And I'm sure the avid bathroom afficianado will be much relieved to hear that.  There's the saga of the flooring - see the Fun Tile Facts website (no, really: to whet your appetite.  There's the way the bathroom evolved and took on a life of its own, growing into something that it was never intended to be.  And then there are the lessons learned.  Thankfully, we have more bathrooms to create and so we will have every opportunity to apply these lessons.

But, for now, there is the surveyor and that burning question: where is the bathroom?

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